Trump’s war on Canada hurts our region

Just as King Trump went to war against Iran without seeking Congressional approval, he has now declared war against Canada without Congressional authorization although he asserts that provisions of the ever-popular Smoot-Hawley Tariff Act that brought additional pain to humanity during the Great Depression is his statutory green light to compel Canada to concede USA control of her trade policies much as England did during Canada’s dominion relationship with the British.

I understand that the war being waged against Canada is an economic war unlike the military war that was being conducted against Iran but is now an economic war because we learned we could not bomb Iran into submission and we are running out of the missiles and munitions to continue. To win popular approval of either a military or economic war against another nation our leaders must provide us with reasons to hate or at least greatly dislike the opponent. We were told the Iranians are a nasty bunch because they are building a nuclear arsenal, developing long range missiles and supporting proxy armies throughout the Mideast. This may all be true, but I have yet to meet an Iranian who I would like to drop a bomb on or starve to death.

And then there is Canada, Oh Canada. We are told we need to get in line and support the economic assault on our northern neighbors because they have always taken advantage of us. I am not sure how Canada with 1/13th the GDP of the US has done this, but the King himself has said it is true. Frankly, the explanation for hating or greatly disliking the likes of Pamela Anderson, Dan Aykroyd, Jim Carrey and Michael J. Fox leaves me wanting more. It is this desire for more reasons to assault Canadians that prompted my search for Canada’s equivalent of a nuclear arsenal.

I have not had to research long to find those reasons. Canada is populated by the offspring of United Empire Loyalists who fled the colonies during the American Revolutionary War. It is not hard to greatly dislike the offspring of cowardly king-loving folks. Let us not forget that Canadians were responsible for our three failed Canada invasion attempts during the War of 1812. If we had succeeded, Canda would be our 51st state today and our King would not have to spend precious time and energy to make it so. I have generated great malice toward Canada because she has emphasized communalism over rugged individualism resulting in socialism in the Western Hemisphere. Further, she brought WOKE to North America with her two official languages and a policy of multiculturalism. My blood pressure boils when I see Canadians flaunting their public comprehensive and universal healthcare at the expensive of private insurance company profits.

And I cannot forget the losses the Canadian hockey teams have inflicted upon USA squads before we got our revenge this year. As summer fades and thoughts of winter enter my mind, I cannot avoid recalling all the frigid air Canada dumps on us for five months out of the year. If that were not enough, she has now taken to dispersing columns of smoke across our pristine sky.

I am sure all other subjects of King Trump’s domain have come to conclude, as I have, that Canada needs better direction from a more superior power in the area foreign trade. With the masterful leadership of our King and his surrounding trade wizards, Canadians will quickly come to realize the folly of their past ways. I will then consider tempering my great dislike of both the French and English side of them.